Blizzard2009AndLosses
Introduction/Definition/etc
Various topics including Homeless and other losses,
floating an idea about using drop in centers as
safe havens for the disabled and homeless,
and more personal stuff...
20091220 18.47 pm Jerry
20091223 19:47 pm some cleanup of spellings,
typos, additions, etc... by the main author Jerry
Body
I can't Not say something about the risks to homeless during
this Blizzard2009, having been out walking around in storms
decades ago while couch surfing and technically homeless.
Now, to be a shut in by somewhat choice/ disability is one
thing, but to be incapable of getting places
because of a public transit and record snowfalls
is another...
I don't want to make this too negative,
but I'm having difficulty (not critical for me,
but might be for others) with cabin fever
today and this week, so my therapy
is writing and journalling....
Last year and previous years, DC did
a homeless losses count about this time
that included Virginia. StreetSense reported it,
and the loss of one of our vendors
who hadn't been seen in a while.
He turned out to be alive, and
I was relieved but also angered by the mistake,
which could have been a source error,
or a reporting/ editing and process error.
StreetSense did report losing a vendor
this year Randy Evans (Volume 7 Issue 2,p.14)
whom I also had met and will be missed.
Other losses have not been a mistake,
as far as I can tell. We lost a Virginia MH advocate
recently and I'm concerned about copy cat
type problems. During treatment and later with
David O'Brien and Russell Woodman I wonder if
Suicide (note capital) can be a contagion/contagious
in a way. Not that the advocate committed,
I have heard nothing to that effect,
nor have I heard otherwise, but grief, depression
and negativity can be dangerous too.
At a time when the federal healthcare bill is
pending adds to the stress...
Congress is closing for the Winter
Holiday(s), session or whatever they call
it and may be trying to finish a
holiday gift tot the people minus
"the public option", free and open source
standards for public health records and
many other things you'd have to be a lawyer
or paid to really understand...
How can the government claim to pass
a healthcare bill that most of the seniors
and disabled don't even understand???
Make it simpler, and/ or explain it
to those that it will effect...
Like the previous Homeless Forums
why not take the focus group type things
to the people who use the system???
Like a ROSI for homeless?
Feds/Congress are rumored to be closing the
Medicare Part D (drugs not dental)
"donut hole." But wait until the fat lady
sings (as they say in opera), or the
fine print/ markup/ etc is complete,
as with most things it will likely/
maybe lose all meaning and certainly isn't
in plain (non legalese) language...
The Virginia Governator is presenting a state budget,
and States and Localities are having budget
issues, with the next state Session and Legislative
Rally, and other state advocacy opportunities coming
up in January around MLK's Birthday.
I don't know what I'd say about the experience
of the last 5 years volunteering and advocating,
trying to create drop in centers,
and all the jobs going elsewhere...
VOCAL Website -> elsewhere
RRWG Proposal Website -> $$ to Network of Care
RRWG Coordinator Position -> elsewhere
My friends -> elsewhere
My caring -> elsewhere
So besides personal finances people might
be stressed with government (see last postings
GivingGovtAPieceOfOurMinds
which does not condone violence, though I understand
some of the frustrations), and was rather negative,
but also shows some escalating frustrations
with our elected and paid representatives and staff...
Like if 70% of people with disabilities are not working,
then many can not afford cars and are probably
trapped inside on bad weather days like last weekends
heavy rains, and this weekends' record blizzard.
Neighbors Helping Neighbors
Various sources and weather alerts say to check on
elderly and disabled neighbors, and emotional/
psychiatric disabilities as well as intellectual
disabilities might be added to this list.
Some say we (Disabled) make good neighbors,
as like retired we may be home more,
but that is good and bad. Good someone
might be around, bad that we can't always
get out and have a regular routine and feel
like the rest of the workforce/ community.
That is part of what Olmstead is about
not segregating disabled in MH Hospitals
like Brown v Board of Education,
ADA and other civil rights from the
1960s moving forward...
I found it interesting that Gov. Kaine was
saying he/they created extra showers and food
facilities (iirc) in a farming communities
agricultural area for emergency situations,
and I wonder if Drop In Centers can be
some of that to MH C/S/X.
Losses and Grief handling by Faiths?
We have at this point some pre and post
holiday angst milieu. Thanksgiving has come and gone,
but the other ones I'm not sure about.
Christmas the dominating holiday for many,
though the commercialization usually pushes
me toward learning other traditions like Passover,
Chanukah (see http://www.chabad.org/article.asp?AID=6218 )
but I will remember
a recent PBS special on Judaic Surviving, migrating,
Holocaust (see and the forming of the state/ country of Israel...
Not to forget Kwanzaa, Ramadan (spellings?:
wish PBWorks had a built in spell checker
that gave me the correct spellings instead of underlining
the things it guesses are wrong, good for typos, but...)
and now the more pagan Winter Solstice
is tomorrow, when they [usually] have the homeless
memorial, but with the snow, I'm not sure if
it happens, or how one would get there.
I generally don't go to funerals much anymore
after personal losses (6 extended family members
over about 10 years) that were never really dealt with,
even in therapy.
Note: Grief counselors (listed elsewhere on this site
following other advocate losses might exist,
if still funded, but reporting losses during
times when someone cannot see their
publicly funded therapist/ counselor/
support team is risky, IMO.
Biking As Self Care
On a more positive notes, I've continued
some personal self care and mutual support
despite a personal funding crisis.
BicycleFilmFestival.com was in town
during a cold/ wet/ snow flurry, which seems
to be it's tradition. Bicycling across Africa
from Egypt to South Africa might be considered
a warming thought, though they mentioned
vomitting, and some things in the indie film
were a little gross. They flew over Kenya
where people were being killed in some
civil / political unrest. Tour de Afrique
supported the tour and since the 30 college student
teams with 100 XOs each called OLPCorps Africa
last summer I've been even more curious
about biking in Africa, not that I've biked across
North America, just some in state week long tours.
Biking the Tour de France looked easy compared
to the race from Paris over cobblestones to Roubaix
(can't spell that either...)... Lance was shown
discussing never racing that one, it's a gruelling
race that takes your morality with it, even to the
ending showers...
The Urban Biking program was amazing
and so thrilling/ gut wrenching that
I forgot to applaud after the
Brooklyn Bombers/ AlleyCat race film...
Think of all the bike messenger type moves
with a helmet cam documenting all the risky
city maneuvers for 10-20 minutes straight.
And the Tour de Afrique (film called
WHERE YOU ARE YOU GO)
was maybe 75 minutes
[at] only one minute for each day spent on the tour,
and I'm sure some editorial magic was involved
in choosing what was appropriate to show on
that tour. I did like the tall bike and interactions
with the kids and local communties...
Yeah, I'm In Print, but No It's Not the Post
And yes there was a t-shirt and a logo and I took
a few photos silent movie clips with my now
obsolete and too traveled still camera
but not formally part of the press,
like for Kennedy Center Open House,
Carrie Fisher's Wishful Drinking,
St. Elizabeth's Summer Concert Series
and other things I reported on in the previous year(s)
while volunteering with Street Sense...
but have moved on the newer StreetSense.org website
(read links broken) and some of what I consider my best
is still missing (Oct 2008? Front Page Photo Gleaning,
6 Black and White Silent Auction shots where a drinker
was in my face and the joke was other guys doing
poetry and stand up type stuff when I was one of the
key people creating the WWFFWG page and buying
food for meetings, etc...).
but I will celebrate the departure of the old
Exec Dir of StreetSense, while we joked about
many things, some gallows and dark twisted
humor to say the least, the unjust "suspension" and
my quietly leaving and an intern taking
the editor position, plus a volunteer editor
and other WillWriteForFoodWritersGroup
page activities give me pause, to be PC about it...
HTHW2009 Redesign
I attended / nay volunteered for the Help
The Homeless Walk this season right before
Thanksgiving (yes I saw people and orgs
I recognized) and cannot give the proper
written report at this time, if ever so far
after the event. I will say,
that the understanding of Homelessness
was a little light in some of the young staff
I dealt with/ was assigned to,
and I'm not sure what college students
learned doing service hours other than
volunteering for walkathons are like cheerleading.
I might redesign the walk to show the sequential
and non linear process of becoming homeless.
Starting from you can't be here, eviction/ foreclosure,
(see GottaGoNowWhat or running away from home/
refugees, etc
on through trying to get services,
(maybe not having a green card/
prove residency with no fixed address,
so no place to really anchor yourself/
qualify from), to move along by police
(and possible arrest or other marginalization
though DC is said to not have a
vagrancy law? maybe because of it's protest
and requiring an Act of Congress to make laws?
or lack of Home Rule? I don't claim to understand
DC politics and even the gay marriage and
Catholic Charities threatening pulling services
to the homeless as politics??? How Christian
is that?), Stopping in at Shelters,
losing stuff to lockers that don't lock,
fighting with other residents, staff
making impossible demands, enforcing
rules, toilet paper as a controlled substance,
in short supply, controlled by the staff,
something most humans take for granted,
even food stamps can't be used for paper
products and if you are in the shelter
you get very little even if you qualify,
because they think you are housed
in a place with food provided,
maybe $80/ month instead of $240?
or is that 1990's numbers, back
when it was coupon books before
Electronic Debit / Benefits Cards
and knowing about some farmers markets
being able to take some forms of benefits,
being categorized as ill/ sick/ disabled
and the ego hit that takes from one
who is just trying to survive...
To Libraries and public places now closed
in the Blizzard2009, to shopping places
where you are followed around for having
bags, carrying your stuff because you
can't leave it or much in the shelter,
hypothermia and over flow you have
to take it all with you, not sure if
the bed will be there the next night
or a delay in returning on time, and
as I used like a mantra at the Housing
Forum and forgot to write up, Your Out/
violated, broke a rule, whatever you
want to call it...
and maybe with a happy ending
in public housing???
as a finish line???
Seems like there should be more running
around in circles and perpetual lines and
hold and frustration than that to make a real
simulation of the actual experience...
Make It Personal
Various service agencies could create
more informative displays than statistics
on signs and music and other entertainment,
which while appreciated, is not the experience
I've had while homeless. Bugs in the showers,
crowded conditions (six guys in a megashelter
room, think boot camp with 5 of your closest
strangers, you're not sure you want to be around
yourself, much less other homeless,
and wonder why some people stay outside
and prefer the woods, think military trained
them to live outdoors and survive...
and similar very early waking hours as a
depressive where sleep is the thing you
try to control for stability and MH?
but trying to get to treatment along
a two hour commute and wonder why I was
resting / silently meditating on the couch
when the day program was trying to start,
and the guys who didn't go
as far were talking late into the night,
though the Walton's Night Uncle Tom
was probably badly worded...
wonder how many of those guys
have survived???), Maybe that was
one of the guys giving the a really
mean look on rail the other day?
Or pre storm assumed
"White Privilege" hatred?
Comfort Is In The Eyes/ Stomach of The Beholders
Food wise, no choice in healthy food
(most shelter food was "comfort food" donated
by churches and other people feeling sorry
for people, and while donating is appreciated,
as a briefly paid staffer, I could not eat that
diet consistently without having adverse
weight, cholesterol and/or diabetic effects,
not to mention personal choice difficulties,
and I am not strict vegan / Muslim (no pork)
either.
Add meds to make you sleep,
wondering what was done to me while
drugged to sleep by other residents,
and the 50 pound weight gain?
Now known to cause diabetes?
And Seldane and other allergy
meds plus some psychiatric meds
cause heart problems, liver, kidney,
tardive dyskinesia, some can be
addicting like benzodiazipenes
(think Valium) for anxiety,
or cross / hybrids like GabaPentin (sp?)
etc...
Enough Already
So saving this for now, as have much more I'd
like/ need to write to get it out of my mind,
give you all gentle readers a clue to what I experienced
and why I want to change things, where some of
the anger, frustration and bad feelings come from,
but am also rambling and tired, and tend to write
more upbeat when rested, but can't as someone
walks on my head, hearing every footstep,
in something worse than most basements
noise wise, and that is without mentioning those
showering on a military like schedule.
"Jaye" aka Bear
Wrapping up, we miss you Jaye /
(aka "Bear" I guessed/ joked when at a MIAW event
where a hibernating depressive journalist
was speaking and he occasionally poked
me in one of my weaknesses) or whatever
name is appropriate or you choose,
Humor as Coping Mechanism With Loss
And if people need some humor like
AlexandriaLaughs
Stand Up For MH see:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TUCjBWV7IA
and/or
https://www.facingus.org/media/categories/entertainment/video
Not that losses are funny in any way at all,
we have lost far too many really good people
at heart, many gone through worse than I
in service to this country, county and state,
but a sense of humor is a good coping mechanism/
defense even if I take it to the absurd level like
the April Fools original idears
highway4.pdf
and far more offensive/ very far out there
NoVAPeersGoesToPrintFINAL.pdf
Let's try to make it back to a point in our
lives where our sense of humor is not
lost. Even seeing the movie Patch Adams
again in the brief time I had some free
premium non basic cable channels
due to their mislabelling,
Patch Adams
I learned things
like Hunter (Patch) Adams was in med school
in our relatively conservative VA, a good student,
older than most other med students,
having just had a psych hospital experience
(I forget the cause, maybe losing his girlfriend?)
the Geshuntieit (sp?)Institute [Gesundheit Institute]
he founded is in VA or
neighboring rural WVA, takes no insurance
and Patch even graduated after being called
up against a dean/ hospital administrator
who probably would not now pass the now
rubber chicken test of humor
MadNation or some (pigeonholed as antipsychiatry?)
Breggan group would annually put the
American Psychiatric Association
(or the American Psychological Association
might have difficulty this time of year too,
so might as well go on vacation while
others are in crisis, no? Ha, Ha, cancelled
your appointments, like done to me,
and originally when my highest paying corp tech
job went south, the private therapist at the time
was caring and helpful, but maybe I was dependent
and a good little patient, before getting fed up with
the waiting, and being told wrong things to do
like take a night time med and then end up
in a car accident like one public therapist instructed
me to do, but I digress into a painful treatment history)
More Seasonal and Other Transitions
It's almost like the late summer to fall transition
in August (though without the dog days of summer heat,
pulling up the mood into some warm thoughts
for those cold right now...).
National Issues
Buck up Congress, please do what
you were elected to do, and stop
having lawyers try to play doctors,
as they aren't very good at it, though
I hear/ do remember the original 70s show
as a kid where the Harvard Law School show
experiment called Paper Chase
and the tough old Prof. Kingsfield?
saying something like
"your mind is full of mush" 8-/
"I will make you think like a Lawyer!"
or similar.
Down to the worst moments
"Here's a dime call your Parents,
tell them you are not going to be a lawyer"
(read locally constituents/ president/ congressman/
or what feels like to me even Recovering/ed)
and see if they think you should
really be in Congress?
Or if it doesn't pass, or Congress doesn't get
it's act together and work out something the people
will be proud of, It'll be an interesting election
next time... Tail wags the Dog, No?
Conclusion
Summary of experience or similar:
More ranting from the unhappy
in a stressful isolating Blizzard2009 time
pre and post holiday with
political, personal and other
losses, a few entertaining biking film festival
BicycleFilmFestivalcom
and other diversions and
media reminders mixed in,
and an attempt at humor or two...
Discussion
A place for feedback on the page presented
Page History
20100114 Jerry
- Adding Header2 Titles and links to an overlong rambling, rant and "tour de mind de lunar blogger"
20091220 Jerry
- Jerry created this page to pseudo report some regional happenings
- that the paid gov't fluff/ PR doesn't cover...
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