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DearTwentySomethings2013

Page history last edited by jerry 10 years, 8 months ago

DearTwentySomethings2013

 


 

Introduction/Definition/etc

 

Waking up in the early am, after a few weeks of an emotional rollercoaster

(aka "Strong Feelings") I have some things to say to mostly the TwentySomethings

I encounter, or if you're not in that age bracket, maybe you can interpolate/

extrapolate....

 

 

Body

 

Well, start with the heading Body,

You've  grown up, somewhat, and have the legal rights to be a full person,

but there's a greater chance you are an ass...

 

You don't have much, likely starting with what you are making yourself,

perhaps out of college?  Or Military, or living at home with the 'rents,

or whatever they are called now a days...

 

But you have some equipment, likely needing use,

so you go to bars, most will drink,

an alcoholic, I once heard starts was early as age 9,

though it's probably earlier now...

 

Remember that first drinking experience?

Thought it would be fun?  Turns out to be vomiting?

Mine was swimming, after a race/ meet? forgotten the name,

been decades, and now Alzheimer's or something...

 

Well 20 Something is like that...

 

No money really to speak of, because starting out in career,

unless socially skilled, probably alone, some might find people,

college sweet heart, high school sweetheart, girl next door,

someone at a bar, on the street, whatever...  We don't discriminate,

maybe parents want them to, but I don't recall doing that much at all...

 

So find a girl/ woman,, in my case she was married,

and we had fun when we could...

This is how I learned about marriage, by being the third wheel,

and starting in a "broken home", had no real morals nor examples

of marriage/ cooperation/ getting along, etc to speak of,

besides work hard, get good grades, eat your vegetables, brush your teeth,

etc...

 

She took pity on me because I had hoped to date someone else,

and kind of took me in.  I'd done medical type stuff, had a Porsche/

Poor Man's Porsche 914 from a family friend, bought a POS

from someone else, another family friend helped cosign.

It leaked oil on the manifold, and smoked up worse than most

BBQs.  Second one rear ended, both later gone.  Had motorcycle,

dirt bike, wind surfer, and basically over extended.

 

Lived in a group house, had bounced around, found something

for me and my childhood golden retriever, later becoming

incontinent.

 

And then it tanked, at least for me.  Relationship ended, I couldn't

deal with being an instant family, and I collapsed,

went for my first  full psych bottoming out.  We will say college time

didn't count, just a practice throw or something...

But I'd been training in the psych ward at the time, Psych Tech

dress up doc wannabe, though had worked at some well know places,

give me the difficult ones, I said, like I was Doogie Howser or something...

so it was worse, I was a hidden consumer/ closet patient

amongst the professionals, mostly nurses, females, and I was a guy,

(note to self, don't harass people in the workplace or elsewhere,

lest you ever know what it's like, done to you....)

coming in from tech work in business suits a couple of custom shirts,

to interview, and then started dress down casual Fridays/

Tuesdays, Thursdays, whatever scheduled, khakis and probably polo,

who dresses that guy?, to deliver people to the smoking area,

(used to see mice/ rats with big tumors in the labs,

and never started myself...) I'd take them to the gym,

outside basket ball court, (neighbors hearing too much

HOR = loose the basketball backboard)

learn some charting aka case notes, try remembering names,

(see ThePaperChase) all new, essentially each day,

as only stopping in once a week or so,

doing safety checks, worried some body would be dead each time

I knocked.   And would I know what to do?  Probably not, got nervous

at anything important.    I sucked at it, by the way, my apologies

to anyone, living or dead from that time...

 

It was hand holding, and I was nervous, try connecting with issues I didn't

fully understand, like poverty being the worst, I, later became it...

 

Anyways, shirking responsibilities, is also a trademark of the times,

F'It or something like that...

 

Recent TED.com talk

http://www.ted.com/talks/meg_jay_why_30_is_not_the_new_20.html

says the 20 something years are a time to

learn and get started, don't waste it, like the Wealthy Barber book,

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Wealthy_Barber

teaches, investing is compounding and you end up basically

when you started, really how early you started doing that, saving,

wisely, it's a game where you know the least, and everyone else wins...

Like gambling, house rules, house wins.  You might get lucky once

and a while, but over time, it's a gamble, IMO.

(insert stock market crashes, 401k, 301k, 01k, etc)

 

So looking back, I was a dick.  I was thinking with it, that's what most guys

do, AFAICT, not sure what women do, or what they think with, as guys,

we just don't understand (to the lyrics of Fresh Prince's

Parents Just Don't Understand)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jW3PFC86UNI

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parents_Just_Don%27t_Understand

and that's a time based reference, you may not know,

if born in a Beavis and Butthead, Simpsons, or Whatever XGames

and cable shows, likely now something created by people bottom up

and uploaded online, or pirated?

 

But getting close to 50, and grey hairs outnumber any hair at all,

"I'm a Guy, I'm Lucky To Have Hair At All"...

 

The body stops working over time, you get fat, or lucky and don't.

Like the brain, it's a tool use it, it gets better, I used to bike all over the place,

mostly for financial reasons, and stank (still do) and had some muscles,

but now just flab, and go further and faster, exploring and trying to stay alive,

which in the last week, has been near impossible.   The traditional services are a joke,

or said another way, they laugh at what they did to me, and I

won't bother trying them, plus the people I know now,

don't know what the 6 years or so of regional and state advocacy were like,

so completely unawares, of what referring a person to the system that f'ed me mover

does to someone. Makes money for them, only, AFAICT.

 

But financial times are different, money is tight,

I was baby boomer, just on Gen X or Y or something,

I can't count, we had slide rules, I was a geek and used that,

I've seen an abacus and there are computer program simulators

of them, say on the OLPC (Laptop.org/ SugarLabs.org)

we had calculators coming out, with red LED characters,

very expensive few hundred dollars for something that's

probably disposable now, not LCDs or anything we had LED,

light Emitting...

 

All that back in the day stuff must be boring, as am I at this point,

thought I was going to be saying something important,

like the letters I'd write to little relatives around holiday time,

or when suicidal, but could not send, too delicate ears/minds for that,

just kept away.

 

So fucking around (not really, kind of love child?)

I may have a son, now grand son, by some accounts,

but she didn't want me to know, I couldn't get along with her,

so didn't see him, she was somewhat scared of me,

as it was dumped on me, I took the blame and ended up family less,

of my own, just family of origin, and don't talk about family online,

it would be good to be frank about stuff ,but this is internet,

and I'm hated, bullied, etc, and just TMI (Too Much Information) anyway...

 

Like Hemorrhoids ,a diagnosis, especially MH, nobody needs to know,

most wear it like a badge, got a label, must put it on my name tag,

like a title, learn what it means, everything about it and try,

the rest of your life to get rid of it, like a scarlet letter or something...

 

I took a turn, life went South, but it continued into bonus rounds,

had had wanted to kill my boss, after comments about him sleeping with said GF.

so I didn't go into the office, job went away.  I got suicidal,

about the time of the Oklahoma City Bombings (note to self, don't spend

too much time watching TV alone (read full time) during disaster times,

go be with others, make conjecture, conflagrations, whatever, stay busy,

do some service to others...)

 

I started noticing, when looking occasionally in the mirror, that my body

was looking like my old relatives, my hair like an uncle's, other parts like

dad.

 

Pools, I used to go to them, every day as a kid, better when out of school,

had full time play, until had to work or something.

In my case an apartment complexes or YMCA,

or later wave pool near one work site.  When I could,

went to the beach, tried wind surfing, got away down south SC, or so,

weekend away. Hotel service, as the stow away...

 

Now spent years before going , I'm the beached whale,

pale and have to exhale just to get up out of a chair,

moaning is part of it.  Two twenty somethings

a Doc with burka I couldn't really talk to and cute Nurse practitioner said

standing back critical like I was to put on a show for them or something,

"Why would anyone want that?" Laughing and ridiculing

Do No Harm?  After waiting hours when it was Urgent Care,

no results during a holiday week, too late to do any good,

for something that I wasn't comfortable with anyway...

 

 

 

 

Conclusion

 

Summary of experience or similar

 

It doesn't get better, really, not to be more depressing than usual,

maybe it does for some, but why aren't you reading the Financial Times,

something religious or something else if that is your Path?

 

What advice can I give someone? Not Much, TwentySomethings and anyone

young might not want to hear it anyway.  Sometimes it might sink in,

IDK (I Don't Know).

 

WTF was that?  Ranting to the world?

 

TwentySomething is a scratch period time?

Not really, the thesis of the TED talk,

http://www.ted.com/talks/meg_jay_why_30_is_not_the_new_20.html

it sets the direction for the remaining decades, and thinking reproductively,

by 30 if just creating a relationship, getting too late to find a mate,

and settle down, clock stops in 30's for many women to have kids, AFAICT.

though many have kids later, finding you can't and waiting isn't always

the best strategy, IMO...  Fertility shots, etc doesn't sound promising, to me,

while young people seem to get pregnant without even trying,

damn rabbits... <grin>

 

Just don't be a dick, as hard as that is to be...

It's expected, as those that have been there know they were, even if they don't

admit it publicly.

 

Your car insurance is high, because you are a risk.

And, well, old people hate you because your body still works

or looks good/ better...

 

So be a good kid and sign the donor card? <smile>

 

I'm just being goth, don't get hurt, we don't want that, just saying.

Don't waste it, we did, or think we did some times, so do better,

that's really all we ask.

 

You don't have to make us proud, we're just glad you

survived this far....

(Cosby quote "I brought you into this world, I'll take you out")

 

Discussion

 

A place for feedback on the page presented

 

If you've lived long enough, what would you do to describe the decades

of your life, say you have two or three under your belt...

Or in sets of 5 years?  Looking back?

 

 

Page History

 

20130724 Jerry

  • Cleaning it up a little after reluctantly trying the traditional system at the suggestion of someone I loved, and finding it less than helpful/ read disrespectful
  • until the Psychiatrist evened the abuse out of the local control freak provider...

 

20130723 Jerry

  • Jerry created this page to pretend to know something, as most writers do,
  • write while down, and try to give back, looking back,
  • and writing badly, maybe rework it later?  Life is just a dress rehearsal,
  • dry run, don't take it too seriously...  Otherwise, you end up like me......

 

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