WaitingForGodAgain2010

 

Introduction/Definition/etc Body Conclusion Discussion Page History Page Statistics Page Views:  since creating on 20090513

 

Introduction/Definition/etc

 

A rambling musing of the later years, housing,

purpose and contributions, media and portrayals,

betrayals and denials of things old, myself included...

 

20100923 7.00 am Jerry (who else?)

 

Body

 

OK, So I've been boring you with details of my life,

and why not give you more?

 

This online log of my decisions and contemplations

and activities has a few purposes:

 

1. Write it out for me, as therapy
2. Share it with others, as the public may not know what our lives are like
3. And others might be few and far between in finding other people in similar situations
4. And to leave a record of what happens, happened, or is happening

 

 

Housing wise, I might have the option of going to a smaller place, for more money,

and waiting for G-d or whatever might happen next.

 

For those that don't know "Waiting for God" is a PBS type show where retirees

cause all sorts of problems in a nursing home/ assisted living type environment,

to the dismay and profit of a nursing home director and staff...

 

The protagonist, of sorts is an older woman, and a side kick, old military

guy, plus lots of other interesting local color, or whatever the term...

 

Set in Britain, BBC show or similar, and with people of a different age,

I'm old, dinasaur, to kids now a day, grew up on computers,

where PONG is the best we had, and you had to go to an arcade

to even play that (with lots of quarters), until Atari brought

it home and you could plug it into the TV set, but I didn't have

that.   I did have a bicycle, and basically ran away from home,

regularly on it.  Wandered around, and still kind of do,

though pains from being hit by a car, repairs necessary

and other activities like finding a place where I can sleep,

and don't have gangs waiting outside for me to come

back (mostly leaving me alone, I guess I'm not their

customer, nor necessarily their amusement,

except occasionally....

 

Anyways, I can't work, I am really disabled, barely

functioning, though better than some, worse than most,

I don't make a lot of sense to some people, but

at least trying to be internally consistent here,

online, and for myself... Even without about 6

years of sleep deprivation...

 

Biking helps some, it is my med, gets me places,

better and faster than buses a lot of times,

and gets my mood up some, even if not the

final solution...  Gets me to support type stuff,

unless hit and killed by a car, or eventually to

decrepid to do it.   90 year old women do rides,

and maybe that is my next step, a grandpa

type three wheeler, Make or Instructables has

a solar panel trike that looks interesting, powers

the motor and goes a certain distance,

CaptialBikeShare.com just opened and may

be an expensive way to do that downtown,

not worrying as much about parking, leaving

a personal vehicle downtown, but like cell

phones, compared to SmartBikeDC.com

the predecessor pilot, it goes into Arlington,

but for $25 for the three hours that used to be

free, membership only, it's not practical for me,

and maybe a lot of others except tourists,

who can now by day long access to tour

the monuments, but not really down to Mount

Vernon estate, I live in the "slums of Mount Vernon"

as I call it, not the estates and nice stuff by the

river, long lawns or trees / park forest, but

highway and gangs, and death, like a grave

yard you pass by so much, the four deaths

I know about, I'm sure there are more,

and hoping not to add myself to the highway

markings, almost gang like, tagging street life

and death for those that travel through and

have little if nothing else productive to do than

hang around and "poets down here don't write

nothing, they just let it all be..."  as an old song

(you know you're old when the songs you grew up

on are in the Oldies station WBIG or similar...

Classic rock, and 60s were about my time,

disco didn't really give a good option,

though Travolta is doing well flying Oprah

around on her last 25 year show,

she was from Baltimore, a broadcaster

done good, I guess, made herself some money,

and giving some back, Howard University

graduation, last time she was around here,

but maybe she becomes press secretary

under Obama?  Union organizing and

pushing Jon Stewart's Earth book,

he spoofed her putting it in her book selection,

to make him some money, I guess, and

entertaining, though I'm more The Big Bang Theory,

and want to be writing my own little Credits

or whatever that Dear Diary, Lenore?

also Dharma and Greg, and Two And a Half Men,

producer, creator, big shot is doing 3 real shows,

vingnettes, juggling as much as he can or more,

the last one I saw said...  (anyway, If I were Paid

for some of this, might find some links for you all,

with nothing better to do than read my drivel,

OK I won't be hostile to my readers and the world,

I'll just fade way, the Undesireables, Unfortunates,

and pretend I don't matter, because to most,

I don't..   Except for what I can for for them,

entertaining them with my dead relatives,

people asking so much personal information,

not really saying who they are, mostly young

athletic peoples, showing up where I go,

and well, maybe my attitude should be

"What's it to you?"    "Why are you asking?"

or "What you talking about?"

Maybe "You talking to me?"

 

I try being nicer than that, but not sure what

people want, maybe they just want me to go

away, off to some retirement slum, sit in a little

box, and have no room for hobbies, but can't

stay outside, the signs say so, waiting for god,

or a ride that doesn't show, or death,

maybe that is the vacancy available, the

previous people died off, better check that out,

but that is depressing, and would you really

want to know?

 

Maybe that was why my father kept going

to the hosptial, so as not to die at home,

nursing thinking nobody wants to die in a hosptial

take him home, we show up once a week,

until you are gone, provide morphine, or whatever,

make drug addicts of old people, and let them

painlessly drift off, but painful for lots of others,

watching an Icon become feeble, and hurting,

there ought to be a better way...

 

 

 

Conclusion

 

Summary of experience or similar

 

Discussion

 

A place for feedback on the page presented

 

Page History

20100923 Jerry

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