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20220418BunnyDayWeekEnd.HP.txt

File history uploaded by jerry 1 year, 11 months ago
20220418BunnyDayWeekEnd.HP.txt

So Easter was this last weekend,
what did someone wearing bunny ears all year around do?

Mostly hide?
seems like it, after the fact,
but also did my 50 mile commute for the first time
in a long while, to get 12Step support in person
volunteer at TBH
in one day,

turns out it's also the 15thAnniversary of the
S H Cho shootings at VirginiaTech
and found out in DC it's Emancipation Dy
freed the slaves, as going for bathroom use
at the library and not even open...

So looking it up afterwards,
it's not exactly JuneTeenth
and varies by state (including DC in that,
though technically not, the District)
Virginia wasn't there much to know,
didn't check libraries, governemnt buildings,
banks, etc, so don't know,
along the trails and roads a lot,
but not much time to stop,
as brakes light to non existant,
and going towards TBH so work on there,
but getting there an hour late,
slow going in mid day sun,
and a lot of things to do,
can i help with this and that,
stops along the way there,
for breakfast, WholeFoods in Reston,
for something immedidately,
Kefir, Peach variety, not found much locally,
and looking for a carrot cake/ bar (skinny cake?)
which found a previous trip,
but not in supply
so bread pudding bar size
and a little attitude at customer service,
asked if wanted bags, turns out paper
so no, the cooling kefir
using Lidl mesh on handlebars
and scarf down in the parking lot,
waiting on the line of traffic that formed
in front of me,
carrying around a plastic take out fork knife
set, reminding myself i'd put the kefir in the
water bottle cage
and interactions along the way with customers
looking baggy so obviously on a trip,
but have to say a long commute, and explain,
bunny ears and bike/ wheel chair equivalent
with duffle bag over panniers,
which keep on scraping, getting caught in the
spokes/ wheels, and a different way of getting
there along North Shore drive,
out to Harris Teeter, and Home Depot,
need a map to find and Wifi
but don't have so guessed from years of going to
Lake Anne, but the farmer's market and crafts not
started up yet there, this year...
Lake is still there statue of Robert E Smith
on a bench, and some new docks/ boardwalk,
redone? and a fountain to aerate the water?
Geese, a fisherman, and cat(s) at the vet clinic
Just Cats of whatever the name,
some Wifi at the Community Center,
Guest? but not the County's?
somehow monitored/ stalked?
and someone came in, interrupting things
while i was talking / sharing
and likely a drop/ dip down,
pointing a camera at my face?
female voice(s) so likely not related,
and/or permitted, technically but not
a bother/ traditional,
only things i can think of
besides the newer higher mileage
contact from liquid soap
fumes/vapors from cleaning
and/or someone

i've usually got a dip/lul
and sharing/ blinding/ also
concentrate on what i'm saying,
but losting track as well,
like a public humiliation and
with VATech and hatred high,
some supports claimed but stalking
more likely pretend/ fake supports
likely too...

FrEnemy and that odd, we know you,
stalk you, hunt more like it,
on towards genocide,
eliminate bunny eared bikers,
in a car affluent areas,
city boy, out the trail,
and looking baggy and different,
shelters and people likely reporting along the way,
tired and hungry, baggy and not rich,
layers leaving so early,
about a 20 mile ride out,
done it for years, then pandemic
and bike(s)/in line mobility aids down,
shortages of parts,
tubes for 26x2.5
switched over to a front 26.2.4
and it's likely pressed wrong or something,
the side toward the wires
and warehouse price bought as benefit for volunteering
so not returns/ support to speak of
a pile of tires, mostly wrong, some indoor track
exercise bike very skinny 1" wide Kendas
and various substitutions better to have things
at wholesale prices, the indoors, thought
to try what something that thin is like
and on sale, but over time,
so many things add up,
to give/ trade try later pile(s)
which is part of the housing problem,
some of which i shared on,
and keeping private stuff private
when i blog/ journal my life so much,
it's difficult to balance...

Cheap $15 Lidl bike panniers pair,
very reflective but doesn't keep it's
shape think there were missing plastic hoops
that weren't there when i bought 2+ sets,
and then more variations the roll over top
more dry sack, and a more regular flap over top,
so have many, more safe to leave on short term,
and carrying things like case of soda,
since gallon water (up to 0.95?
was 1.21 for 2 with tax
small math problem for some)
is in short supply sometimes
closer in at Aldi...
sugar water non fake sugars,
leading to weight,
treat self with can of things,
but balance of water to soda
to milk, etc...

Eating my way through the frozen sweets
isle of Lidl and Aldi (someone online created
an ice cream guide to Aldi)
I've been more Gelato at Lidl,
but some larger plastic tubs
strawberry and a mixed berry at Aldi
labeling info in the plastic,
instead of paper over plastic
so if it frosts/ melts not losing
get mushy paper, readable, etc...
so variations on that, to try
and all builds up to many packaging...

Biggest thing is having to move,
likely put in for a move,
then elevator menaing/ ridiculing,
gloating at getting rid of me,
maintenance, i could fire the guys,
some voice i don't even know whom,
maintenance supervisor, or county
and tear up the request/ thing faxed
in and already jumping on the elevator
menacing on the way back,
so conflicting, i don't answer the
harassment, oppression much,
wait and thing, not knowing who,
not having a reasonable amount of time
and information to make informed decisions
save the voucher is the main thing
$800 / month is what keeps me afloat/
solvent/ in budget/ plan
in rent help, took 10 years to get
the Section 8/ Voucher,
and had for about 10 years,
and trying to steal it,
claiming i'm not doing my part,
abusive inspector,
AttemptedMurderByInspections2018
or so and
then losing my mother, grief
some stuff, including compressor
ice cream machine
pandemic, stuck in more,
and led / snow balled into other things,
having to justify/ fight/ explain myself,
to the public/ audience/ readers/
and try and defend myself,
also gets tiring...
very


But short time, red herrings/ diversions,
distractions, maybe waht told verbally is correct,
lease says they can do  verbal/ voice/
instead of written, but double standard
of the nturn around and do the opposite,
lying/ good faith, and just plain criminal,
discriminating, afaict... IANAL, and all too...

So a heavy load, and take a weekend off of that,
but can't really with short deadlines,
working on application,
costs $50 + $150 help from family,
and competition, everyone in your/ my stuff
at the photo copying and gossip,
people enjoying my troubles,
guy at the bank,
likely a drive by/ messed with,
bad feelings like accused of something,
or stalked, setup, etc...

Not that type of disabled/ crazy,
that's a whole other camp
Depression
SchizoPhrenia
Anxiety DisOrders
Personality DisOrders
the four major categories,
and substance abuse,
intellectual disabilites,
separate silos
and one gets confused between,
oh you're like x,y,z
Beautiful Mind SchizoPhrenia/c
RainMan intellectual / with savant
Temple Grandin Autism, another
not much on depression there,
bipolar female professor, forgetting name,
but seen in person a few times,
Kay Jamison UnQuiet Mind
ElectroBoy less well known
and others,
to numberous to mention, and
do a shrimp list it all guy Tom Hanks played
life is like a box of chocolate
Forrest Gump....
all HollyWood stories, ElectroBoy not a movie?
but cleaner and marketing, and stuff,
the reaility is less pleasant,
but something cononical/ archetypes
for Jungians / Frued types to analyze
playing armchair psychiatrists,
when reality is not so nice...

Homelessness has similar, names
excapting me, a musician comes to mind,
with issues, of course...
but not the name, maybe later...

So freeWriting/ MourningPages,
and recovery too...

Seem to be bumping into Amy R. from
RRWG days going to MerriField Lidl
gets a lunch break if i'm in the area,
and some info relayed as the longest
surviving employee of the project
I and others advocated for,
so many years ago,
can't say much about it,
and running out of time/
energy, burned on many ends this
weekend and coming up one even more
DeadLines...

So SunDay after working on my own
bike after Clinic in PetWorth,
just getting there was work/ effort enough,
staffing volunteer only clinics, lots are stepping
up, had an online class/ training, which i missed,
New Volunteers, only offered once/twice a year,
people moving and floating in and out of the DC
area, Pandemic effects, and seems Ace Hardware
changing from ownership/ Annies' to
someone else, to employee owned,
t shirts i notice hadn't talked with staff,
much to know, but 3 of 6 frozen Lidl mango cream bar
disappeared quickly in the beginning
not enough for everyone, a second box?
late arrival, about the time people getting lulled,
an hour in, setup and early arrival, hosting,
greeting, lead mechanic/ floater, all the roles
among others taught/ trained on,
shadowing and a bunch of new people
the mileau safe space and other things
to learn, teach, practice, preach, drone on about,
i'm not a good example of it,
but know from years of being around,
privacy of guests, some want attention,
many instance of archetypes there too,
i got into a few different
playing social butterfly, ironically,
some easy stuff, not the expert,
but had things that might help,
look at Park Tools videos,
for crank puller,
i don't do it often,
and not touching things
still eating,
had after the popsicle stick,
ReUsed that as a fork, slow eating
discounted Macaroni Salad,
shoveling/ spooning, thinking myself clever for ReUse
slowing things down and keeping my too talkative
mouth busy, but likely bothering others too busy
to eat, they may not have had the hours commuting
before and missed meals as pedaling during those times...

and then the two melted/ milkshake like ones
i finished later,
a lul myself, and off to the bathroom
at hte library,
over to Yes! organic market
if the PetWorth Farmer's Market is open,
i missed it, not seen,
so may not be started yer, but soon,
hopefully...

Though a rushed story of the weekend,
many sequencing build up, after the fact,
and poorly told,
bought stuff at Yes, frozen orange juice
not concentrate, and a banana bean pie
annoying people, maybe loops around looking
for a public restroom, none found/ seen
had to ask at checkout, nope...
and the kid in the stoller, i'm trying to show
the bunny ears lighting up as well as checking out,
at the register woman, asking / telling stuff,
the kid thinks i'm questionable/ not sure/
don't like, i'm 40+ miles into a first
long one of the seasons 50 mile day,
so not seeming very presentalbe,
and a reprise of homelessness on the horizon(s),
trying to get volunteering in,
so pack up and keep going,
cashier/ staff suggested Wendy's
as use b athroom there,
blocks away,
more to buy, i guess,
didn't try, kept going and SafeWay store,
had been as far as CVS before,
but luckily not that far,
what they have
gallon cold water,
share with others fill their water bottles,
grab another separate liter like,
found carrot cake square slice of sheet cake,
and some other things,
but heavy, tired, mid day,
and getting expensive,
SNAP EBT as a federal program
the virginia card works in DC too,
which has helped get myself treats,
for going out and exercising,
skipped the Ace Hardware large
interesting Root Beer, Birch Beer,
Sarsparailla, cream soda, etc
collection
bringing my own,
from Lidl and other places,
so sugared up, ate and feeling it,
needed A/C even below 80F
in the mid day sun, full set from
0900a+ donig the trail back,
didn't bail, but not sure about later,
DC back to Virginia,
ended up stopping and fixing my own
brakes, leaning over bike/ down a problem,
rubbing and bag water bottle, inner tubes
as bungee cords/s traps,
temperature makes a difference on the rubber
bandish qualities of the carods,
so slips off the end of rack,
shifting and and edge of bag
into spokes, filling and closing
and found proper older hooked
in my bag, collected and part new
bought set from a while ago,
to jury rig a solution, annoying even
myself having to stop and adjust so often,
and brakes getting further safety issues,
all the way down and slow to stop,
big hills doing down to the river,
walked some, for safety, and
Fred Flintstone stops others,
but finally found a stairs
outside a Homeless coalition office
church not far from Dupont off Florida?
i'd visited Jesse old Vendor Manager
and bought a t shirt, donkey and elephant,
not sure where that is, maybe another thing
lost/ stolen over time, an advocacy
statement to say the least,
help the homeless walk long t shirts
from 2001 on, frayed and looking their age,
andwhat a return to living it,
instead of just writing it would bring?
death? as feared?
retaliation/ finally getting one upmanship?
and having worked on the other side?
many may have been angered,
perceived slights/ retaliation(s)
besided the usuals,
idk, don't even remember many people
customers/ clients so long ago,
much less those i was in with,
decade(s) ago, people change appearance
over those time frames,
graying hairs, balding, if even still alive
so many of the authors/ vendors may have
been lost, keeping up with from StreetSense,
never did get the equivalent started in Virginia,
the paper crossed the border some,
but not nearly enough, for a Virginia
version, afaict...

One of the things i was trying to do,
dropping off some older issues at Lamb Center,
pre 9/11 anniversary, MetroAccess overflow
taxi ride into just before RRWG meeting,
and ran over my feet as i was getting my
bags out of the back seat of the cab,
near Performance before they redid the shopping
center there... Driver change? and wouldn't
call for help/ ambulance i had to do that,
and then said i hadn't paid,
my part i did, driver change, likely,
and didn't get me there safely i'm supposed to pay for
being run over, WTF?
The cross county south to mid,
and other problems, pre crash killing General Officer's
family or similar, wish i'd made more of a fuss/
litigation, even answering call from a lawyer
at the time, required getting up,
on bad feet, and then a repeat trip the next
day, from the same cab company
harassing at the door,
when calling dispatch, thought funny
ran over feet, haha...
like done on purpose/ happens regularly,
etc...

But it digress, taking StreetSense to Lamb Center,
turns out in FairFax City, so dispatching problems,
and then going to get records/ police report,
ambulance and ER visit charges, bills piling up,
etc...

All not that different than a poilce report
of being hit on a bicycle in Capital Hill,
police report said a Huffy bike low department store,
insulting difference to bike geeks/snobs,
not Gary Fisher, and messed up taco's front wheel
and questionable? RockShock fork,
at least reported to WABA crash db, iirc...

building the dynohub wheel what was in service
for 10? years, until recently, wholesale
disc wheels (sets), etc...

But getiing tired, and more to do today than jsut
this drivel, Harvey the invisible biker bunny hid
mostly this weekend, especially SunDay,
getting online and getting Ubuntu booting again,
Developmental version took a day of trying
but luckily a closed center for Easter,
so WiFi while not always connecting,
had to go into Windows to do that agree/accept
connection, and then over to Linux,
in whatever developmental inconsistant
package state, broken/ missing,
not completing apt check
update/upgrade,
download an ISO of Beta image
a newer SugarOnAStick Fedora Live,
and updaing windows i'd not been in much
since getting orginally in 2018,
updating FireFox, LibreOffice
and the Windows stuff too,
took all day,
finally adding
apt install lxde
apt install mate
both desktop environments,
try getting past the Gnome DisPlay Manager
GodDamn i'm calling it bug,
or whatever, not sure what it was,
but back and forth,
someone claiming gave a virus
others stalking on the trip out to Reston,
and Back to DC, suggestions/ directing/
bossy/ nosy, pretend hleping when didn't
ask, as they say, unsolicited advice
is abuse, i'd done a little like that,
but considered it safety to get people
to sign in to TBH clinic, for liability
know the risks, and first in the order
of things talking what they need
and get who it is, and assumption of risk(s),
drop tools on feet, hands get (k)nicked,
how to keep clean, and contact if virus,
or other things, mostly forget/lose something on site,


i'd noticed a bad pedal on teh way back,
broken right one, not sure if bike fell,
layered by the door and work areas,
getting in and out of bags,
or someone replaced/ took mine,
thinking i had bought several from warehouse,
not stocked in the store, low money, etc...

Closing up TBH clinic a Gallon of water
for others, one guy didn't have a water bottle
the bag piping edge was rejected,
i wasn't giving the second bottle
ended up a chugging pour into mouth from above
feed the bird, but worked,
if not breathing and talking about when,
seemed to have done it before,
and ok givng water,
seems cruel not to have access to water and bathroom,
what i got it for besides myself,

up the hill,
unsolicited biker advice through PStreet
a shop there, and i'm looking badly
proper fitting and they get a lot of people
from us? some rivalry/ goading/ harassemnt,
but i didn't respond, like a lot of things...

Finally getting home,
brakes a little uneven,
a third hand tool,
and ow to keep them from tilting
when tightening the old gary fisher
cantilever (i->e?) brakes,

finally home
and the banana bean pie interesting
fin and unpack, rinse, macaroni salad container,
put away chiabata (Italian for small slipper?)
bread loaf and bagels, freeze,
$1 small creamy peanut butter jar,
and have food(s), not sure how that's
going to work out supplies saved for sailing trip
and bail to hotal from here, if have to go,
likely how it goes, today and other starting
the what took months long transition when had
a place to move to before,
still in limbo so many ways....

Collapse/ down like many other trips,
finally get to my home/ bed
and need to stop, crash,
A/C and all the other spoiled necessities
many take for granted, when touring
traveling, vacationing, despire HikerBikerCampSites
and other free options, it has it's cost(s)
laundry, wet, damp,
and those vacay type things are done voluntarily,
afaict, for a change / break from routine,
this something different,
PutinOnThePike,
and other invasions, degradation(s)...

Does it create a crisis
especially involving services,
which aren't trauma aware,
having been before,
threatening again, is terror like,
so others don't have to worry?
and obsolve themselves of their part in things,
blame shiftings and finger pointing
especially if things go wrong/badly?
He's done it before,
much younger, first time, unknown,
different economy,
chronic, recurring,
labeled, SSDI, SNAP/EBT,
so somehow makes ok to do to again?
it's a blame shifting,
he's like that and a shaming
victim bashing, etc...
imnsho


More will be revealed,
as they say in 12Step program jargon,
but a back step,
recovery is not a linear progression,
while conflicting addictions/ codependency/
a progressive fatal disease,
alcoholism, food, money, codependence,
clutter/hoarding/ etc...

The balance between seems a tight rope
walk, not circus death defying trapeze
act, but reality in it many forms...

And someone shows up headlights in my face
again, do you work here?
Hours by the entrance in garage,
closed building and somehow suspect,
take a photo of car lights in my face
left one, not turned off, all the empty
spaces and have to park in the ones i'm
a road kill run over victim again?

That someone(s) stopped,
leave him alone!
etc...

Bunny Hunting likely,
and yet another attempt on me,
one of many it seems over the weekend,
in it's many forms,
and that's without a kid asking so many
questions, seems need a hug,
and i'm not a hugger,
later calming with a POD song lyric,
maybe the kid needed a hug
forget the song and artis title proper...
gut tmentioned them before
in case read some other pages/
drivel...

Available Times up,
off to other things...
Ding/ bell?
Hortn/ Whistle
like bike use
for start 12Step meeting time,
but not...
Or clowning farting like sound horns...

and yeah, i should brush my teeth
and i'll be cold, but carrying a jacket,
can go back in if get cold,
took maybe half an hour
and had a place to do that...

Had plans/ idear of a bunny puzzle
gifting a gelato container with
ReUsing left eggs,
a number for a unique user / kid number,
parental permission/ write a page here,
and collect information,
sharing and putting out a task,
overflow packaging,
and some rewards for doing so,
entry and label learning,
sugar antidote,
but fell through without energy
and going other things...
mainly burning off last week
and what's ahead..


N.B. This mornings mango crean popsicle
(near fin box, try coconut? next?)
to cool off and oatmeal to finish
bag may have fueled the run on
and on and on (GoGo? but not upbeat?)
writing style...

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