PatrickSnow
PatrickSnow was a friend of mine that I brought into OOOFC
from a support group. He had been involved in the development
of a CIL (Center for Independent Living) in Winchester, VA and was
quick to show interest in something like a drop in center in this
area. I probably complained about the difficulties in dealing
with the project and some people, so I can't say he wasn't
aware of most of the issues involved and the risks before
even meeting the group...
As an elderly retired millitary gentleman, he was soft spoken
and had the patience of a saint in dealing with the politics
and personalities involved. Over time and several trips to
various places with another buddy, we went to places and
he even crawled into the back of a van one time for a short
ride home with extremely limited space. As usual, he was
good natured about it, and we all laughed at that, though
thinking on it now, remembering he was around 70 years
old, I would hope to be limber enough to accomplish
the gymnastics involved in that little trip.
He was fairly quickly accepted into a rather exclusive club
of the OOOFC organizing committee, in a way that
actually made me feel betrayed. But that was his personality,
somehow liked by just about everyone.
So we had disagreements, and I had wandered to
another project OPFC and later CWC to avoid some
interpersonal conflicts that had gotten to unacceptable levels
with OOOFC.
We would occasionally talk on the phone to catch up and
even set up a few times to see one of my favorite
tv shows which aired on Friday nights, Joan of Arcadia.
as the broadcast time conflicted with Agape Reservoir,
the mental health ministry that met after Friday afternoon
OOOFC (dis)organizing committee and subcommittee meetings.
He had rented from Netflix several Joan of Arcadia DVDS and we sat
in his new place in River Towers with the dog and
ate a little and watched as much tv as one visit would comfortably
allow. (The dog didn't eat much, but I think we did share what he
was allowed to eat...)
Later, I took him to eat for his birthday (St. Patricks' day)
at a little Indian restaurant where we ended up discussing my life,
and catching up some, as I hadn't had any skill in trying
to celebrate or create events for others.
He talked to the local homeless people outside the restaurant,
and it impressed me how he could get someone to say, that they
wanted to kill everyone, while I countered, that I hoped they
didn't mean Patrick too, as I kind of liked Patrick, and he
had done nothing to anyone that I could think of...
Another visit, he showed his garden and we talked about
his walking early in the morning around the neighborhood.
His grandchildren were a favorite topic, and I had hoped to
someday have a cross family friendly competition...
He had gotten a new car during one of the spans of time
we didn't talk much, which caused some concern,
as in the support group, he had described an accident
which might have been a suicide attempt. We talked
about his doctor clearing him to drive, and what limits
he had on himself about using the car. He was proud
of the car, had 'saved his pennies' and accomplished
getting back to driving even at a later stage of life
when most would have had others drive for him.
Even more time went by, as I was commuting to mid county
by public transportation, about 2 hours each way, so
we lost some contact with the schedules...
We talked about his driving, and while unsure of himself,
he would not venture out very far or in certain conditions,
even to get to a start pickup for the CWC trip to
On Our Own of Maryland conference in Cumberland, MD.
While biking there, I called on a cell phone in some of the
most remote areas (really needed a satellite phone,
it was so rustic) trying to arrange a pickup for him to
attend his second OOOMD annual conference event,
having gone to the Ocean City beach with OOOFC while I went to
CSPNJ.
Another time, he met my father (who had a lot in common)
in the area and we had seen his car and dog in the back
on the way out. The dog had been shaved for the summer
heat, but the tinted windows provided some protection
to allow the dog to stay in the car while eating on Beacon Hill.
Thinking back on who to call about a last minute
scholarship recommendation to AlternativesConference2007,
I called Patrick. He was rushed and stressed with a car accident
he had had, and a rental car bill coming due. Still we caught
up a little and I even asked if he wanted me to write
a recommendation for him to also apply for the conference
in St. Louis. St. Louis didn't interest him much, so write it
yourself and send me a copy, he said and off
we went back to our lives.
A few days later at the Bridge event, I heard that Patrick
had died of a stroke on Memorial Day 2007.
He will be missed by everyone who knew him.
Links
external links only to memorabilia about PatrickSnow
(because we don't have file space on this pbwiki.)
Page History
20071206 Jerry
- Jerry created this page after months of avoidance to remember a fallen friend, in the war that should not be fought...
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